Kid Stuff, Q & A, part 3

Q: How does a single mom continue to discipline and guide a child when the other parent is "the pal" and tells the child he doesn't need to obey?

A: I received several question like this one. Unfortunately, most divorces are ugly. In fact, I can count on one hand how many "friendly divorces" I've seen in my life. Usually there is so much hurt that ex-spouses try to get back at each other...too often kids get caught in the cross-fire or used as pawns to wound the ex. My response is that ex-spouses have to drop their weapons and call a cease fire when it comes to the kids and raising them right. Great effort and energy must be put into "same page alignment" when it comes to parenting. Sit down with your ex and say, "We may hate each other, but there's one thing we love in common, our kids. And if we don't come together and cooperate and do what's best for them, we will ruin them just like we ruined our marriage." What I'm saying is sit down and be mature and agree to a parenting strategy that's best for the kids. No more games.

I know this won't be easy. Make the attempt. Do your best. Take the first step. That's all you can do. I applaud you for not giving up or giving in and taking the easy way out.